Pursuit Vs Acceptance

Why hello there! 

I've been meditating a lot this summer. It's been quite majestical because this is exactly how I wanted to spend it. The past 2 years were very hard: I was taking 18 credit hours, working a crappy, minimum wage job, wedding planning, doing my teaching hours, and living at my parents. SUCKED!!! 
Now life is definitely sweeter and much more relaxing. I found a teaching job, we are happily married, our home is cozy and calming, and we have two awesome cats. THANK YOU JESUS! 

The reason for this post evolves from what I've seen on social media lately. It's literally all about weddings, engagement rings, and children. It is very tiring! And this comes from a married woman who just had a wedding, got proposed in the mountains with a beautiful ring, and went on an international honeymoon. I cannot imagine what people who haven't experienced any of these things feel like, and I want you to know that if you're single right now, you should not compare yourself or feel depressed because singleness is a beautiful thing. 

I decided to title this post "Pursuit vs Acceptance" because it is important to distinguish the two, to understand your timeline isn't duplicated with another individual on this earth, and your choices that lie ahead. The idea came from a book I've been reading titled The Happiness Project.

After you hit a certain age, people wonder when you're gonna settle (marriage and children usually). It is interesting how people measure success, and how they compare themselves to others. The following are just patterns I have personally seen amongst friends and acquaintances, and are not generalities:  People who are very successful in their careers, but lack family settlement (that of marriage and kids) are usually attacked and questioned why they haven't achieved that. And people who have a family early in life have a different vision on how they use their money, and don't spend on things such as trips overseas often or dining out every weekend. At the end of the day, people always wish to have what others have which is so twisted, and teaches us how our nature is so quickly to lose focus and gratefulness.

So, pursuit vs acceptance. For me, I had to pursue certain things by a certain age, but others fell into proper place when they needed to. I can't plan my whole life and control everything that happens, but I should have realistic goals and a vision. 
I wanted to graduate college in 2018, so in 2015 I buckled up and got serious about my education. Marriage was something that my husband and I talked about on our first date. Marriage and a wedding were important to my husband, (and for me too, eventually, but I was in travel mode). However, I loved him and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him, so we decided to get married when the time was right, and that time was in 2019, after one year of being engaged. 

Acceptance is a whole different thing. If I never met or dated my husband, there's no way I could've planned a wedding for 2019 and pursue marriage. It's just not how it works. And same with my education, if I didn't take 15 and 18 credits a semester, there's no way I would've graduated when I wanted to. I would've had to accept the fact that graduation was going to be delayed. BUT I PURSUED IT BECAUSE IT WAS IN MY CONTROL. 

Acceptance is taking like for what it is, and pursuit is breaking away from that unto something fresh and new, if you desire it, and if your time has come. 

You're single? Enjoy. Dating? Enjoy! Still taking college classes? Go out and have fun with friends! Don't get ahead of yourself.
People who rush their seasons end up worse than before.  

The process in between sucks and it's painful. Trying to get an education, trying to meet someone, trying to get out of your parents', trying to be out of debt, etc! But don't lose your vision!

Can you combine pursuit and acceptance? Of course, but be realistic about it! Acceptance shouldn't be settling for less either. 
If you're not happy with your personal or professional life, then change it! 

Truth to be told is people like to take shortcuts, and most of the time end up unhappy. 

Don't get salty when others are pursuing and winning, it's their time and not yours. You have no idea how hard they worked to get there or achieve that. 

Know when it is time to pursue something, and time to accept things for what they are. I have to accept I don't have a million dollars at the moment, so therefore it's going to take time to pay things off and such.
Come up with a plan and stick to it. Think broadly, think as a team if you're married and think individually and collaboratively with others as a person. Connections are a good thing to have :) 

Enjoy your day!